converting-kulindadromeus:

soyouwannaconverttojudaism:

Probably 80% of the asks I receive are from people who are in remote locations/ don’t have access to a community with a rabbi. I think this is one of those things that has always plagued potential converts and it certainly plagues diasporic Jewish folks, and I think it’s been amplified by living in the digital age; now anyone can access information on Judaism and digital Jewish communities, but the synagogue/rabbinic system still relies on the presence of physical communities and teachers for conversion. 

The reason I’m not answering these posts is because any answers I could provide are seriously based on that individual’s needs and specific situation. I can’t do much with “I don’t have access to a rabbi HELP” except for assure you that you’re not the only one in that position–far from it–and that there are still options. 

For those of you who have sent in these kinds of asks (again–about 80% of my inbox right now), I’ve received your questions and I see you, but I think I’m going to work toward creating a masterpost with a list of resources/options/strategies rather than try to respond to each and every individual and be in the position of constantly pinging followers for additional feedback.

In general, though, I think we need to de-emphasize the state of being “fully converted” and focus more on the process of Jewish becoming. It’s okay if it takes time. I understand the desire to be out in the world proclaiming ourselves as Jewish and I know it’s difficult to be in the liminal space of no longer quite a goy but also not yet a Jew. But the point of conversion is not to earn the ability to just call yourself Jewish, the point is to be Jewish in a deeply committed, deeply felt sense. The waiting is not only worth it, for many of us (me included), it is part of the process. If you need a Torah example, remember that Yisrael lingered on the edge of Canaan for forty years developing a sense of peoplehood before they could actually enter. Waiting, being displaced, being in the wilderness, being in between, are inherently Jewish states. I think we do a disservice to the people and tradition we are trying to join when we let ourselves think of this as a race to the finish line and not as a process that requires our sincerest patience and careful thought and intentional labor.

To my fellow conversion students, or those who wish to begin the process:

I get you. It’s hard to be in a liminal space. 

But as someone who is almost finished with the process – 

Don’t rush it. Never rush it. 

I’ve been converting for a year and a half. Thought about it for 12 years before that. 

Important things have happened in that time that you should never diminish: 

1. I have thought about this decision so thoroughly that I know it is right. You shouldn’t rush into conversion. Rushing into conversion may allow you to make a choice that isn’t actually right for you. I know it feels diminishing and belittling to have this said to you – trust me, I do. But it’s important to remember that this is a difficult decision to revert. In fact, you can’t. 
2. I have been given time to wrestle with it. Being a member of B’nei Yisrael literally means to be the people who wrestle. As I’ve converted, I’ve had my moments of doubt, my moments of laxing in observance. And that doesn’t make me any less serious of a convert. It makes me human. It makes me a person. If you don’t have enough time in your conversion to doubt, to give yourself room to wrestle with your decision now that you’ve made it, you may have trouble when the decision is done and you’re forced to do that wrestling later 
3. The longer you go, the more observances you can add gradually. The point of the Jewish conversion process is slowly, slowly becoming a Jew. You can’t adopt all the mitzvot at once. It’s too much, and it’s too overwhelming. Jewish children can’t do it either – they train, slowly, and adopt things at their pace prior to bar or bat mitzvah age. A good example of this is Yom Kippur – they start off with small fasts, growing in fasting observance until they’re a bar or bat mitzvah, and then they are able to do the full fast. You have to do that process in a much shorter period of time – children have 12 or 13 years. You have 1 to 3. Why would you want to make it even shorter? 
4. The longer you practice, the longer you work at it, the more comfortable you’ll be calling yourself a Jew when it’s time. Trust me, it feels like it should be so easy when you start out, because it’s what you want. But you shouldn’t be just starting out and calling yourself a Jew – and it shouldn’t feel right if you do so. Practice and study will make it feel more authentic. You don’t want to rush that. 
5. You want to be able to build a relationship with a community and a rabbi. I know this doesn’t apply to the specific question of “I can’t have one!!!” but studying will make you feel more confident entering a space when you do have access to one. And, when you do, you don’t want to rush adjusting to that space.
6. Antisemitism is rough. Give yourself time to get used to dealing with and processing antisemitism from the point of view of a prospective jew. Don’t brush that seriousness away. 

   And, most importantly of all: 

7. More time means you can read more books!!!!!!!!!!! 

miriams-song:

Hello, Anon!

It’s fantastic that you’re interested in Judaism, but you’re also in
such a transitional period in your life (adolescence). What you want now
may be completely different than what you want in four or even eight
years. How long have you been considering Judaism? Give yourself a year
or two to deeply contemplate this change, possibly longer, because
Judaism will always be there for you. Start off by reading (I suggest To Life by
Harold Kushner), and then start attending Shabbat services to see how
they feel. Study the different denominations. Most importantly, give
yourself time. Don’t rush.

To answer your question, you’d
need a parent’s permission to begin any conversion classes. Conversion
is an intensive (and individual) process that demands a large sum of
time, dedication, even money. Here are some factors to consider for anyone who wants to convert:

• Mobility–do you have reliable transportation?
• (With school), will you have enough time to complete required reading, attend events, go to synagogue, etc?
• You
  will often need to spend some amount of money during the conversion
  process, be it synagogue dues, book fees, etc, but you can absolutely talk to your Rabbi about this if you aren’t in a position to spend this money.
• Are you in a safe environment, physically and emotionally, to pursue conversion? 

Here are some resources I personally used when I first started learning about Judaism:

BOOKS // nonfiction

• Choosing a Jewish Life – Anita Diamant
• Living a Jewish Life – Anita Diamant
• To Life: A Celebration of Jewish Being and Thinking – Harold Kushner
• Essential Judaism: A Complete Guide to Beliefs, Customs & Rituals

  – George Robinson

• To Be a Jewish Woman – Lisa Aiken
• What is Kosher?: An Introduction to the Laws of Kashrut – Dr. Juan Marcos Benjarno-Gutierrez
• Is It Kosher? – Rabbi Eliezer Eidlitz
• How to Keep Kosher – Lise Stern
• The Sabbath – Abraham Joshua Heschel
• The Jewish Holidays – Michael Strassfeld
• Finding God: Selected Responses – Rifat Sonsino
• The Shabbat Table Companion – Rabbi Zalman Goldstein
• The Jewish Study Bible – Adele Berlin

BOOKS // fiction

• The Chosen – Chaim Potok
• My Name is Asher Lev – Chaim Potok
• Davita’s Harp – Chaim Potok
• The Red Tent – Anita Diamant

PODCASTS

• Stuff Jews Should Know
• Judaism Unbound
• The Jewish History Podcast
• Jewish History Podcast by Mottle Wolfe
• On the Other Hand: Ten Minutes of Torah 

WEBSITES**

• http://www.chabad.org/
• https://reformjudaism.org/
• https://www.myjewishlearning.com/
• http://www.jewfaq.org/ 

**The information on these websites may differ with denomination

I hope this helps!