Go ahead, call child protective services! Uproot us from the only things we have and send us to the fucking tax farms! I’m fucking nine, asshole, I can only do so much and I’m SORRY!
Poor Kyle D:
Also, I just noticed how Butters was the only one not to jump. I wonder if that’s cause of his parents abuse and he’s used to it??? D:
A note on the topic of trauma that I personally found helpful in accepting the idea that I am a trauma victim is that one of the most widely accepted facts in the field of trauma research is that abuse is often not the common factor in whether somebody will develop ptsd.Â
Many people can go through awful things without developing trauma based disorders as long as they receive compassion and support in processing those events as they happen. The most common factor in developing something like ptsd is emotional neglect. And emotional neglect on it’s own can be enough.Â
Whatever you went through was enough I promise, you’re not overreacting. Abuse and neglect are traumatic at any level, you don’t need to have gone through the worst possible experience you can think of to develop ptsd. If it hurt you then it hurt you.
…..oh.
And to support that, the number one determining factor on how badly something affects a person is how they’re treated afterward, not how objectively bad the event was. They’re called resiliency factors.
It looks like this:
Horrible brutal traumatic event + Family and community support + legal amelioration + closure and therapy and helpÂ
ONE MILLION TIMES MORE LIKELY TO RECOVER THAN
Event that the sufferer may think “seems minor” compared to what others have been through + Family neglect and abuse (you deserved it, name calling, support the abuser) + no legal means + denial and stifling and no therapeutic support
I have been raped, I have been abused by someone who was supposed to be family to me, and I have recovered and gotten my life back together. I have psychiatrists, psychologists, best friends, lovers, and family who support me. I did not get legal justice, but I got the person(s) out of my life.
My friend was repeatedly verbally abused by his step-parent, and when he was abused and hurt by others he was blamed for it by that parent. He had no support and no one to talk to about it for over 10 years.
He still feels guilty for even being affected by it and I’ve had long talks with him about how it isn’t “nothing compared to” what I went through.Â
You are not wrong to be upset. You are not wrong to feel the effects of trauma. Your hurt cannot be measured against anyone else’s. Your resiliency is your own and your situation is valid to you. Perception is everything. The worst thing that ever happened to you might ostensibly be less bad than the worst thing that ever happened to me – but it still is what happened to YOU.
I have to wonder how much self-loathing came crashing down on Ed, once Oswald confessed to killing Isabella, and realizing he’d given the same excuses to Kristen when he confessed to killing Dougherty.
Maybe that’s why, when he grabbed Oswald’s face, he seemed to go from angry to hurt. Maybe he saw himself, pathetically begging for understanding, in Oswald’s eyes and couldn’t stand how similar they really were. Quite possibly the catalyst for his obsession with destroying Oswald.
“If he goes away, that part of me goes away too, and nothing will ever hurt me again.”
Oh, umm, I actually don’t think he felt any self-loathing over that. In fact, I think Ed would be furious if anyone tried to compare the two situations. He would use the defense that Dougherty was abusive while Isabella was innocent. And while I don’t disagree with that, I think he’d be missing the point that killing someone’s gf/bf without their knowledge because you thought it was in their best interest, is just wrong. Also the “I killed him because he was hurting you” excuse doesn’t work for why he killed Kristen. Just going to draw attention to the last gif for a second:
There’s a reason I decided to include the footage of him strangling her instead of just cutting off after his words. It’s to show the irony in telling a woman that you were just trying to protect her from abuse, while strangling her with one hand and covering her mouth with the other. Also, he kills her right after she says that she’ll turn him in and he’ll be sent to Arkham. It definitely wasn’t an accident but I think Ed has probably convinced himself that it was. So, I really don’t think he would make the connection between the two situation, despite the similarities.Â
🔥 There is beauty in destruction🔥 